The many faces of Liesl-Mae

Ready or not, here I come!

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Happy always!

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Ok..not always..

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Dozing off..

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Dream, dream, dream…

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Rascal in the making..

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Tough Chic

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Daddy’s thinking look

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& BLESS YOU!

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More photos here:

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=187192&l=bd76b&id=838950536

http://www.facebook.com/p.php?i=838950536&k=XVA34VS6T4WMXBLBVCVUX

The mother I want to be ….

I am selfish.

Motherhood is an experience I wouldn’t want to share with anyone else.

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I want to be the mummy who is the first to see her baby (duh!)…

I want to be the mummy who is the first to carry her baby… (other than the docs..)

I want to be the mummy who holds her baby in her arms in her first car ride home from the hospital….

I want to be the mummy who gives her baby her first bath at home..

In fact, I want to be the mummy who bathes her every day and gives her a good massage every evening..

I want to be the mummy who makes decisions for my little young child.

I want to be the mummy who soothes my baby when she cries..

I want to be the mummy who teaches songs and rhymes to my lil’ one.

I want to be the mummy who brings her for walks in the park..

I want to be the mummy who cooks her favourite dishes.. (tho it may not taste great..)

I want to be the mummy who is there to witness her first word, first step, her every firsts..

I want to be the mummy whose words and thoughts carry weight in my daughter’s life..

I want to be the mummy who corrects and disciplines her and then tells her I still love her..

I want to be the mummy who will train her to be independent and learn to make her own wise decisions later in life..

I want to be MUMMY.. the only mummy to my child.

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But in merely 3 weeks, I’ve realised that I have already missed some experiences and the journey of bringing up Liesl-Mae Avin is shared by many.

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Motherhood is about sacrifices.

Ultimately, I want to be the mumy who is able to sacrifice some of my ‘I wants’ for the good of  my lil’ baby.

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Pray I can.

Liesl and grandparents

Ah Kong, Ah ma, Tata, Apachi..

The four grandparents who totally adores her.. and would  by no doubt, spoil her! =)

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Arrival of Liesl-Mae Avin : The hours backstage

WARNING: A long read…


MONDAY 1 DEC

12.00am – 6.30am : Wide awake. Watched some labor & childbirth videos!

Had some funny expanding feeling in my tummy every 1 hour or so tho.. Brushed it off as baby stretching as she was awake the entire time with me since midnite.

6.30am – 10.30am: Finally rested.

12.00 pm : Had lunch at in-laws in Klang.

3.00pm – 4.00pm: Stuck in a typical illogical Malaysian jam on Kesas getting back to USJ. Tummy’s getting rock hard every 10 min. Not much pain tho. Decided to go to the hosp. (Finally!)

4.00pm – 4.30pm: Bought some chocs, showered and posed for the camera before heading to QHC!

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4.30pm-5.30pm: In labor ward, hooked on CTG machine to monitor baby’s heartbeat, her movement and my contractions. Moderate contractions 7 min apart. Baby’s still ‘high up’. Still smiling and walking as usual.

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5.30pm: Admitted for monitoring. Dr Subra said I’ll be discharged in the morning if labor doesn’t progress.

8.30pm: DINNER / PARTY TIME! Photos are self-explanatory!

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11.50pm: Had the ‘show’.. A sign that delivery is imminent.

TUES 2 DEC

6.00am: Woke up and had breakfast.

10.00am: Dr Subra did a check. Only 1.5cm dilated.  Had to option to go home and wait.. or induce.

11.00am: Was wheel-chaired to the labor ward. Induced through drip. Baby’s heartbeat’s monitored.

11.30am: Contractions are 3 mins apart now. Pain’s still bearable. At some point, baby’s heartbeat dropped to 60 then up to normal reading again.. (Normal reading: 120-160bpm). Nurses checked, apparently CTG machine’s a bit faulty. Changed to the machine at the next bed, so I can’t keep an eye on the reading anymore.

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12.15pm: Dr Ng performed amnitomy aka assisted membrane rupture. But he says it may take 1-2 hours to delivery OR 1-2 DAYS!! Contractions are hurting more now. Had a passing thought: Shall we try ZERO painkillers delivery?

1:12pm: Pain is increasing, contractions are 1-2 mins apart. Still bz sms-ing! AND.. STARVING!  But I  can’t have ANYTHING except water!

1.42pm: Cutting short Avin’s lunch. Pain’s becoming unbearable. And envying the lady at the next bed who’s not feeling the dilation check cuz she’s on epidural!!

2:41pm: Finally.. I caved. Painkillers #1 – Pethadene injected into me. Immediately felt drowsy and high but can’t feel the contraction pain at all! Still sms-ing! & STARVING!

2:55pm :Last record of sms sent to mummy. It must have become super duper unbearable after that!

I remember squeezing Avin’s hands so tight, refusing to let him leave my side, and I was DEFINITELY screaming!

At some point an hour later, I asked for Painkillers #2! Felt drowsy but could still feel the pain! Was almost screaming at the nurse for giving me a ‘faulty’ jab.

Finally…………. after all the screaming in pain, at the nurses, at Avin…. not to push and push..and an episiotomy that my poor Avin had to witness…

5.05pm: Liesl-Mae Avin made her grand entrance into this world of ours.

(Oh, did I mention I had like at least 5 on-lookers/fans/student nurses cheering me on at the last few minutes – “sikit lagi.. push..sikit lagi..yay…” Quite encouraging and hilarious actually…)

I remember Dr Ng holding her upside down. Dr Subra was there too, trying to lighten up the situation.. and helping, of course. She wasn’t opening her eyes nor crying for a good 2 min, I think!

While Dr Ng finished the job on me, Dr Subra worked on Liesl-Mae. Apparently, she’s sedated from my painkillers…hence taking some time to cry. Was a little worried there for a while..

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And here’s the placenta (GROSS!!) …… Dr Ng asked if we wanted to take it home!

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Tried to breastfeed her before we both were sent separate ways..

6.00pm: Back in the room, had my long awaited lunch/tea/dinner – milo and bread!

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phew..what a day!

but oh well, the pain is beautifuly worth it!

more pics of Liesl when i log on next!